Tuesday, November 04, 2008 4:56 PM
actually i m realli very sad, its juz tt i no longer know how to express it out.. for the whole day, i juz kept quiet, smile assuringly at my frens to show im alright..
i thought back to ade's bday.. when ah an hug her from behind, gave her a peck on the cheeks and said bibi happy bday.. OH, tt is so the moment every woman would love to have..
for mi this yr, i have no one special to do this to mi, and nv ever have i ever tasted this moment b4.. guess i shall have to wait for another yr.. hais, my grand 21st, my onli 21st.. i m out of love.. nv ever i have dreamnt of this misery..
anyway, even if, even even if he was to be there, he can nv nv nv nv nv cut the cake together with mi.. yes.. that is impossible.. he cant be there during day, cuz he need his precious slp, he cant be there night cuz he wan to work.. he cant be there at midnight cuz he has alot of frens going out, and he might even put my bday into one of his waiting list and put his frens first..
yes, thats how i feel.. and im sure this feeling is correct..
realli, i gotta move on n stop telling m,yself i got someone special.. so wad if i regard him as my special boy, does he ever regard mi as his?
this celebration is turning from a big one to a tiny one.. yes a tiny oneee.. very very tiny one.. onli a few colleagues and gfs n their bfs coming.. no more..
dun ask mi, im extremely sad..
no people, no special boy.. no anticipation, no mood
thank you for my tears are falling for the 2nd time which i've alr tried very hard to control..
